What if a NO might be a blessing?
At some moments in life it feels like I am surrounded by the word NO.
The first reaction is I am excluded, I am rejected.
And then I breathe.
What if these NOs are opening up to something else, something that is still not visible to me?
The other day I made an interview in a cathedral. It felt very special. And the location helped create a very existential talk. It was like magic filled the air. And in that presence we created together it felt like anything, just anything is possible...
What do I exclude from the anything by having ideas of my future, about what’s the next step on my journey, or about what is really happening in this moment.
I have had dreams and visions, sometimes specific, where I have seen pictures that I have interpreted in the, for me, most natural or evident way.
It’s like some parts of me are waiting to recognize the moments I have seen in my visions.
And then, sitting there in the cathedral, another interpretation surfaced. What if it’s already happening, but in a way that is not compatible with my own ideas? What if I am blind to what is really happening? What if I am not aware of where I put my feet or what I really am surrounded by?
For a moment I feel surrounded by the word NO. It’s people who exclude me, and this exclusion makes me feel uncertain, scared, and sad. I start questioning myself, I try to see what might be wrong, what I might do to please, and in some moments I can feel some anger surfacing, it’s like any rejection, especially when I feel a bit vulnerable, takes me to the time of my life when I was bullied, and stood alone, all the other children turning their heads in other directions.
And then I wonder what possibilities these NOs will give me. Are they pointing me in another direction? Are they telling me it’s my time to make the choices, not waiting for some special others to invite me in? Are they telling me that something else is already happening, and that the no from others is a gift, is a blessing, are telling me it’s time to really walk my path?
I don’t really know. My life seems to have magical and mystical aspects. Some things are not for me to know in this moment. My part of it is to follow my intuition and let it guide me, and acknowledging the bumps on the road and how to handle them.
Some years ago I had a vision. I saw something grow under a black cloth. Some day the clots would disappear and I would see what’s underneath.
In this moment it feels like I am that what was hidden before, it’s just my mind is not able to tell me what I am, what I see or what is happening.
My intuition tells me that I will, soon, have some guidance about what space is opening up, when some doors seems to be closing.
Charlotte Cronquist is a love warrior
Love is the answer