Sexsibilityteachers: Sara Skaarup on polyamor and jealousy

Lovely writer, journalist ans sexologist Sara Skaarup will join the upcoming sexsibility training giving a lecture on polyamor and jealo...

Lovely writer, journalist ans sexologist Sara Skaarup will join the upcoming sexsibility training giving a lecture on polyamor and jealousy.
She’s interesten in looking closer on the, sometimes hidden, contracts between lovers, and how to create openness and fidelity in a relationship.

I first med danish Sara Skaarup at last years sexisibility festival. A smart, soft woman, who seemed to really see people around her. To me she has a very dear presensce and I feel happy when Sara is around.
And she dares to discuss our behavior, unspoken roles and find her own way. And she makes her personal choices grom her heart, encouraging others to also find their way.
Sara works in the area of love and close relations, since it’s there most people find the meaning of life.
– 10 years ago I was chief of a magazine about hair and makeup. It paid well. But day by day I got further and further away from myself, spending all my time writing about superficial subjects. One day I just gave in my notice and started freelancing and studying sexuality. I felt this subject would make sense to me on a long term base, and I was right.
How did you choose your field, your perspective?
– When my husband and I discovered that the traditionel monogamous life style did not work for us, I looked for books to read but found nothing in danish. After several years of living in different degrees of openess, it made sense to me to write about the dynamics of this way of living and loving – hoping that others might find it helpful. This – and the topic of jealousy – since became main topics of mine.
How has working with sexuality changed your life?
– To me sexuality is the base of life and cannot be isolated. Working within this field is working with personal growth and development – and sometimes it is the students teaching the teacher. I have also experienced, that the subjects I deal with is a very potent one, that rises many emotions. I have no answers, that goes for all, and no desire to convince anyone, still my message is for some people quite controversial.
What insights would you like to share with the participants?
– That everyone is entitled to identify their very own idea about what love and fidelity is – and to make a life acording to that.
What perspective do you plan to bring into the sexsivilitytraining?
– Everyone that is in a good relationships wants to preserve it. For some people it works better to easy the grip than to tighten it – sex is not dangerous per definition, but lying and deception is.

Sara is a writer, journalist and sexologist. She has written the book "Kærlighedskontrakten – åbenhed og troskab i parforholdet" (Lovecontract - openness and fidelity in a relationship). She has also been involved in the launch of Denmarks first love operation - called Dynamic relationships - where couples get help to develop their relations in new ways. Where they use lovecontracts and where the traditional sexual monopoly sometimes is abandoned. Sara also teaches students at Sexologyschool andPsychology and love at Krogrup Folk High School.

We have allmost a full group in the sexsibility training at this moment. But you have still a chance to join. And we especially welcome more men into the group. Get in touch if sexsibility feels like the right path for you! And do it soon. The adventure starts February 20th.



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Charlotte Cronquist

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Bloggen för dig som vill få ut det mesta av livet. Författaren och coachen Charlotte Cronquist lär dig hur du får bättre relationer och hur du kan älska mer. Blogposts in English available.




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